Thursday, November 5, 2009

Foot on Table, Not in Mouth

As the prospect of perhaps feeding many ungrateful relatives looms, the equally dismal prospect of table decor looms larger. Face it: none of us are Martha Stewart. Hell, even Martha Stewart isn't Martha Stewart (can't you just see her, lurking over the stove and gobbling leftovers like a solitary freak. Silver place card holders? I don't think so).

Anyway, I think this is a great gift to buy as a hostess gifty for a relative you're not so crazy about, but who's cooking for you. It purports to add to decor, but it's a shoe. Like the kind of shoe hurled at ex-president Bush by an irate Iraqi. Or a shoe that's been out hitting the pavement for a long, long time. Perhaps even the shoe you'd like to insert in your uncle's mouth once he's had a few. This shoe, though, is fashioned of porcelain and holds a lovely candle, illuminating all those shiny happy faces gathered around that holiday table. And, finally, the shoe could be made for walking, which is what you'll do, right out the front door.

Is this not your story? Lucky you. The shoe candleholder's still pretty nifty. And, at just $28, is the sort of bargain that could leave you footloose and fancy free. Find it at

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