A True Turkey of a Gift

I know this is supposed to be a gift recommendation blog, but every once in a while I see a gift so ridiculous, I feel obligated to poke fun. This turkey is one of those gifts.

I suppose this is a gift for the child who has everything. One who really has everything, because there are endless gift alternatives to this thing. As you can see from the picture, this is one big turkey (I know the kid looks happy, but I believe she's been coerced). A massive monster of a bird, impervious to buckshot, which will sit in a corner and menace residents and guests in a sinister avian way. Seriously, have you ever really seen a turkey? They are ugly birds. And formidable, too. In fact, a hostile turkey male can seriously beat up a grown human. This is not a stuffed representation you want in your home; it's not warm, it's not cuddly, and it has a creepy crepey neck. Ew.

Besides, if you purchase this gargantuan gobbler, you must really have everything, too. Or at least a ton of cash, since this tower of stuffing costs about a cool grand. There is a smaller version, for $150, which still seems about $130 too much. Still interested? Fine, go to Chasing Fireflies.